Wisbech Town FC Forum

I turned to my wife tonight and said, "You know what, I think of our marriage as being just like the World Cup."

"That's sweet," she replied. "You must mean that it has its ups and its downs, sometimes it is thrilling, at other times a boring test of endurance, but ultimately it's something to be cherished."

"No, you fat c**t," I sneered menacingly to her as I grabbed her wrists and marched her forcefully towards the front door. "It's over!"

A woman goes into a doctors' surgery and says to the doctor: "Doctor. I've got a terrible problem with discharge."
The doctor says: "OK! Take your knickers off and pop up on the couch."
The woman does as she's told and the doctor starts to probe her fanny. He uses all manner of medical instruments to look at her minge before he comes and up and says to the woman: "I'm afraid I'm going to have to get a second opinion on this."
He calls in another doctor who uses even more medial instruments to probe her chuff before he surfaces looking perplexed. "I'm afraid we need to call in specialist," he says.
The specialist comes in and probes her deeper and harder than the two previous doctors before he to comes up looking perplexed.
He says to the woman: "We've all had a look and probe around your vagina but none of us were able to find any sign of any discharge."
"Actually," the woman says, "the discharge is in my ear, but thankyou all for a wonderful afternoon."

A man in Spain goes to a restaurant, sits down and looks at the menu. Suddenly he smells something delicious and looks around to see what it is. He soon realises that it is coming from the table behind. He asks the waiter for the same as them to which he replies "I'm sorry sir but we only serve that dish once a day, you may order it for tomorrow however" So he does. He comes back the next day, sits down and gets his food, after eating it he asks the waiter what the dish was. The waiter tells him that it is the testicles of the loser of the bull fight who is dead. The man then asks why his was so much smaller than the other mans yesterday. The waiter replies " Well sometimes the bull wins"

Two paddies were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind him and fill the hole in. They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one man digging a hole, the other filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger,
'I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting in to your work, but I don't get it -- why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?'

The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed,
'Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the lad who plants the trees called in sick